One of my workout DVD’s ends by telling me I am “amazing.” The first time I worked out, I scoffed at this notion. “Amazing? For finishing a work out video? Please.” But somewhere along this struggle, I’ve come to believe it—at least, when I finish a work out.
It’s so easy to forget the rest of the time. I’m late for class. I skipped class. My homework isn’t done. I only got a B on that test. I forgot my niece’s birthday. My nephew called and I forgot to call him back. I blew up at my mom.
The dishes in my sink are piled high with no end in sight. That conversation with so and so ended so awkwardly, and it was totally my fault for being a weirdo. I feel like a frazzled, effed-up failure.
But the days where I actually think I’m fucked up or a failure are becoming far less frequent. Yeah, I’m frazzled, but EVERYONE’s frazzled. This is the US, after all.
And I find that the more adept I get at exercising regularly and frequently, the more often I do my homework. The more often make my bed. It’s a criss cross effect. But for all that, I’m busy all the time, and sometimes, it’s nice to be reminded that I’m amazing. Especially when it is by someone who isn’t Shaun T (the workout instructor from my DVD.)
I went out to the Wild Rover on Saturday, which is my favorite bar in Marquette. My roommate and I were in sore need of roomie-bonding-time. We ran into some people we know. Mostly, though, I introduced myself to a bunch of people I DIDN’T know.
Once of my favorite games to play at the bar is “Whose hat can I wear tonight?” I got quite a lot of hats, and plenty of pictures to help fill in the blanks for the morning. I don’t typically black out, but sometimes things get a little fuzzy.
The game got a little old, and we started to leave. On the way out, a song came on that we had to dance to. So we did. There was a guy who was lurking awkwardly on the edge of the dance floor, so I invited him to come out and dance with us.
Learned his name was Chris, got his phone number. Told him he should have been wearing a hat. Went back to the bar, ran into a man I knew and his friend. His friend’s name was Kyle.
“Hey,” Kyle started, “I’m really bad at dancing, but would you like to go onto the dance floor with me after this drink?” I was flattered. Through middle school, I was the girl people would play pranks on their friends with.
“So-and-so wants to dance with you,” the kids would say. The few times I believed them, it turned out to be a practical joke on the other person.
So at first, I was skeptical. What if he was joking? But it turned out he wasn’t. After Kyle and I slammed an Irish Car Bomb, we went out and danced together. I dragged my roommate with us, and it was really fun.
Nights like Saturday remind me that I am attractive. I may not be gorgeous. I may not be hot. But I can go to a bar, in khakis, a single swipe of mascara, and a t-shirt, and have cute guys ask me to dance. I woke up the next day with no less than five pictures of me in different hats, and three men's phone numbers. I wonder how much more attractive I will be when I start believing it, instead of being shocked when I realize it.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Friday, February 19, 2010
Workout? Completed!
I just wanted to share something that I am really proud of myself for.
Two and a half months ago, I popped Hip Hop Abs: Cardio Blast 2. It said 45 minutes to completion, and I was like "Ugh, no way!" So I shut it off and did the 23 minutes Hip Hop Abs: Ab Sculpt 1. Today, I wanted to work out from home, and I didn't want to do any of the level 1 stuff.
So, I popped in the Cardio Blast 2.
AND I completed it. Not only did I complete it, I also told my roommate to stop watching me workout when she came home earlier than expected. Normally I would have just shut it off. And when she came back and continued watching me work out, instead of stopping or flying off the handle, I just kept working. I got flustered, and I messed up the steps, but I kept working.
Feels pretty awesome.
Two and a half months ago, I popped Hip Hop Abs: Cardio Blast 2. It said 45 minutes to completion, and I was like "Ugh, no way!" So I shut it off and did the 23 minutes Hip Hop Abs: Ab Sculpt 1. Today, I wanted to work out from home, and I didn't want to do any of the level 1 stuff.
So, I popped in the Cardio Blast 2.
AND I completed it. Not only did I complete it, I also told my roommate to stop watching me workout when she came home earlier than expected. Normally I would have just shut it off. And when she came back and continued watching me work out, instead of stopping or flying off the handle, I just kept working. I got flustered, and I messed up the steps, but I kept working.
Feels pretty awesome.
Small Goals
The route I’ve taken to up my health is sparkpeople.com. Why them? Why not… Weight Watchers? Or Jenny Craig? Or Nutrisystem? Or South Beach?
Because, my friends, it is FREE! I can eat whatever I want. I feel no pressure to eat nothing but bacon. They actually encourage me to eat carbs. I was tempted to do South Beach, but two weeks without fruit would possibly kill me. Additionally, I don't like Splenda. The Sparkpeople website’s founder, Chris Downey, recently authored a book called “The Spark.” Aside from being annoyed that they’ve gone from being 100% free to almost commercializing themselves, I’m actually pretty impressed. The book takes the program they have on the website and condense it into four weeks. And I’ve been loosely following the book program while sticking to the internet one, and I’ve discovered a couple of things.
I can’t eat for weight loss. I can’t, can’t, can’t do it. Because what happens then is that I don’t lose weight. When I eat healthy meals, I feel better about myself and I feel more energized throughout the day… and it’s nice to know that I’m eating well. It just FEELS good.
And it turns out when I eat for weight loss, I don’t actually lose weight. Goes back to the credit limit thing? I tell myself that what is important is the week over all, and that I’ll be good the next day but tonight, I REALLY WANT THAT FRUIT ROLL UP!
When I make meeting my calorie and fat and carbohydrate ranges my goal, instead of weight loss, I do a much better job. I’m boycotting the scale for two weeks after Monday. Because the first few weeks, weight loss was the goal, and I would get down to 315 and back up to 320 and then back to 315. And why Monday? Well, folks, the On Campus Apartments is having a “The Biggest Loser” competition! Heck yeah. I’m excited for it. Cheer me on, right? Right.
The same thing goes for exercise, by the way. Some weird thing, boundary, something has passed. The first couple of weeks, the idea of exercise made me feel dread and shame and tired. And that was before I even DID anything active. Now physical activity has a hint of appeal to it—not a lot yet, but a sort of “Hmmm… working out could be fun right now.” I even found myself popping in an exercise DVD because I was exhausted when I got home from work. I had so much more energy after! It’s interesting the different tricks and tips I’m learning about my body.
So every day, I decide whether or not I’m going to be within my calorie range. And I decide whether I’m going to work out. If I do both, it’s been a pretty successful day. Monica was right—baby steps are totally the way to go. I don’t even get upset at myself any more when I don’t work out or go over. And the most interesting part of that is I’m on day five of being within my calorie range—which is probably the longest streak I’ve ever had. It will possibly be broken tomorrow, when a certain classmate and I go out drinking, but Sunday will start a new week.
I’m feelin’ pretty good about all this today. I think I'll go work out now.
Because, my friends, it is FREE! I can eat whatever I want. I feel no pressure to eat nothing but bacon. They actually encourage me to eat carbs. I was tempted to do South Beach, but two weeks without fruit would possibly kill me. Additionally, I don't like Splenda. The Sparkpeople website’s founder, Chris Downey, recently authored a book called “The Spark.” Aside from being annoyed that they’ve gone from being 100% free to almost commercializing themselves, I’m actually pretty impressed. The book takes the program they have on the website and condense it into four weeks. And I’ve been loosely following the book program while sticking to the internet one, and I’ve discovered a couple of things.
I can’t eat for weight loss. I can’t, can’t, can’t do it. Because what happens then is that I don’t lose weight. When I eat healthy meals, I feel better about myself and I feel more energized throughout the day… and it’s nice to know that I’m eating well. It just FEELS good.
And it turns out when I eat for weight loss, I don’t actually lose weight. Goes back to the credit limit thing? I tell myself that what is important is the week over all, and that I’ll be good the next day but tonight, I REALLY WANT THAT FRUIT ROLL UP!
When I make meeting my calorie and fat and carbohydrate ranges my goal, instead of weight loss, I do a much better job. I’m boycotting the scale for two weeks after Monday. Because the first few weeks, weight loss was the goal, and I would get down to 315 and back up to 320 and then back to 315. And why Monday? Well, folks, the On Campus Apartments is having a “The Biggest Loser” competition! Heck yeah. I’m excited for it. Cheer me on, right? Right.
The same thing goes for exercise, by the way. Some weird thing, boundary, something has passed. The first couple of weeks, the idea of exercise made me feel dread and shame and tired. And that was before I even DID anything active. Now physical activity has a hint of appeal to it—not a lot yet, but a sort of “Hmmm… working out could be fun right now.” I even found myself popping in an exercise DVD because I was exhausted when I got home from work. I had so much more energy after! It’s interesting the different tricks and tips I’m learning about my body.
So every day, I decide whether or not I’m going to be within my calorie range. And I decide whether I’m going to work out. If I do both, it’s been a pretty successful day. Monica was right—baby steps are totally the way to go. I don’t even get upset at myself any more when I don’t work out or go over. And the most interesting part of that is I’m on day five of being within my calorie range—which is probably the longest streak I’ve ever had. It will possibly be broken tomorrow, when a certain classmate and I go out drinking, but Sunday will start a new week.
I’m feelin’ pretty good about all this today. I think I'll go work out now.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Behaviorism and a 555 lb. teenager
At 320 pounds and 21 years of age, my life is difficult. It was in high school too, but not because I got picked on; because I was for the most part ignored. To maintain 320 pounds, folks, I must admit—I do quite a bit of eating that isn’t necessary, and I do less exercise than I should be doing.
As a psychology major with a likin’ for behaviorism, I can tell you it breaks down to a couple of things. I’ll define a couple of terms for you. Yeah, you’re getting educated. Learn to love it. Keep in mind, the examples are NOT going to be universal for everyone—they’re meant to clear it up a little.
Positive reinforcement: the addition of stimuli that increases the behavior immediately before it. (You put money in a vending machine. You push the buttons. You get your preferred treat. You are more likely to do this again the next time you are hungry.
Negative reinforcement: the removal of stimuli that decreases the behavior immediately before it. (You have a kid. The child is whining and whining about wanting something. You yell at the kid. The kid stops whining. You are now more likely to yell at the child.)
Positive Punishment—addition of a stimuli to decrease the behavior before. (A child is screaming. You smack them upside the back of the head. The addition of pain makes it less likely he’ll scream.)
Negative punishment—the removal of stimuli to decrease the behavior immediately before it. (You put your money in the vending machine. It gives you no food. You are less likely to use that vending machine.)
Now, there is WAY more to behaviorism than the things above. But those are some of the core concepts, and they are most effective when used consistently. Punishment is typically bad for learning productive behaviors, and reinforcement is typically the best way to learn new things.
So I’ve broken down some of my own behaviors regarding food. In a later post, I'll take some time and think up ways around these unhealthy habits.
1. I find comfort in food. It is something that has always been available to me, so when I’m uncertain about things, I eat.
2. There’s an immediate reinforcement when I eat. Ummm.. it tastes good.
3. Eating is something everyone does, so I use it as an excuse. If I’m at work, instead of just taking five minutes to myself and being like “Screw you,” I’ll typically eat something. They can’t get mad that I’m eating, right? Everybody eats!
4. I use food not only as a positive reinforcement, where it tastes good—I also use it as negative reinforcement. When I’m freaking out over something, I’ll eat because I don’t have to think about the negative things while I’m eating. There was a study done with bulimics where they were told to record their negative self thoughts on a recorder, and every time they went on a binge, they had to listen to it. I’m not sure that was really removing the negative reinforcement so much as adding positive punishment, but either way, the rates decreased rapidly. The title of the article is “Evaluation of
extinction as a functional treatment for binge eating” and can be found here: http://csaweb105v.csa.com/ids70/view_record.php?id=1&recnum=0&log=from_res&SID=28270a2luf5s3jjvrn9grr7rb4&mark_id=search%3A1%3A0%2C0%2C1
Fortunately, something is coming into play that is going to help me balance the scales a little bit. Exercise. I’m starting to feel energized immediately following exercise. Since I often feel tired, it’s a pretty good reinforcement.
So, you might be all like “Ok, that’s nice.” But I wanted to lay down some groundwork before I got into this next article that I read when I woke up this morning.
There has been a fourteen year old boy taken from his mother because he weighs 555 pounds. As an obese person, I can sympathize. As an advocate for healthy children and parents, I cannot. Because there is more going on there than a lack of vegetables. BECAUSE of my behavioral background, I feel pretty damn sure that a large part of what is going on is that she doesn’t have the time, and so he’s very literally eating his emotions.
But it’s not okay. I mean, I struggle at over 300 pounds. I can’t imagine being 14 at 500+. I think it was right for them to take the child away. The mother works several jobs, and was given a warning and some time to start getting his weight under control. She has claimed she couldn’t afford anything. That in itself makes me sad.
Why, in America, can we not be proactive without a product? Does it just not occur to our consumer-driven minds? He should be out walking. Even if it’s just a couple of blocks to start.
I don’t think she should be charged with neglect. I think that going to jail for neglecting a child is really stupid and silly in many cases—but the judicial system is a whole new topic for someone else to blog about.
What I DO think is that they should both be entered in counseling, free access to a local pool for exercise that's gentle on the joints, and a couple of trips to the dietitician. The mother needs to learn how to say no, what proper eating looks like, and how to motivate her kid.
And the kid is getting to an age where he needs to take some responsibility for his actions. Which is rough, but he’ll feel better in the long run. If you want to read the article, head over to: http://www.dailyspark.com/blog.asp?post=should_mom_of_555lb_boy_be_charged_with_neglect
As a psychology major with a likin’ for behaviorism, I can tell you it breaks down to a couple of things. I’ll define a couple of terms for you. Yeah, you’re getting educated. Learn to love it. Keep in mind, the examples are NOT going to be universal for everyone—they’re meant to clear it up a little.
Positive reinforcement: the addition of stimuli that increases the behavior immediately before it. (You put money in a vending machine. You push the buttons. You get your preferred treat. You are more likely to do this again the next time you are hungry.
Negative reinforcement: the removal of stimuli that decreases the behavior immediately before it. (You have a kid. The child is whining and whining about wanting something. You yell at the kid. The kid stops whining. You are now more likely to yell at the child.)
Positive Punishment—addition of a stimuli to decrease the behavior before. (A child is screaming. You smack them upside the back of the head. The addition of pain makes it less likely he’ll scream.)
Negative punishment—the removal of stimuli to decrease the behavior immediately before it. (You put your money in the vending machine. It gives you no food. You are less likely to use that vending machine.)
Now, there is WAY more to behaviorism than the things above. But those are some of the core concepts, and they are most effective when used consistently. Punishment is typically bad for learning productive behaviors, and reinforcement is typically the best way to learn new things.
So I’ve broken down some of my own behaviors regarding food. In a later post, I'll take some time and think up ways around these unhealthy habits.
1. I find comfort in food. It is something that has always been available to me, so when I’m uncertain about things, I eat.
2. There’s an immediate reinforcement when I eat. Ummm.. it tastes good.
3. Eating is something everyone does, so I use it as an excuse. If I’m at work, instead of just taking five minutes to myself and being like “Screw you,” I’ll typically eat something. They can’t get mad that I’m eating, right? Everybody eats!
4. I use food not only as a positive reinforcement, where it tastes good—I also use it as negative reinforcement. When I’m freaking out over something, I’ll eat because I don’t have to think about the negative things while I’m eating. There was a study done with bulimics where they were told to record their negative self thoughts on a recorder, and every time they went on a binge, they had to listen to it. I’m not sure that was really removing the negative reinforcement so much as adding positive punishment, but either way, the rates decreased rapidly. The title of the article is “Evaluation of
extinction as a functional treatment for binge eating” and can be found here: http://csaweb105v.csa.com/ids70/view_record.php?id=1&recnum=0&log=from_res&SID=28270a2luf5s3jjvrn9grr7rb4&mark_id=search%3A1%3A0%2C0%2C1
Fortunately, something is coming into play that is going to help me balance the scales a little bit. Exercise. I’m starting to feel energized immediately following exercise. Since I often feel tired, it’s a pretty good reinforcement.
So, you might be all like “Ok, that’s nice.” But I wanted to lay down some groundwork before I got into this next article that I read when I woke up this morning.
There has been a fourteen year old boy taken from his mother because he weighs 555 pounds. As an obese person, I can sympathize. As an advocate for healthy children and parents, I cannot. Because there is more going on there than a lack of vegetables. BECAUSE of my behavioral background, I feel pretty damn sure that a large part of what is going on is that she doesn’t have the time, and so he’s very literally eating his emotions.
But it’s not okay. I mean, I struggle at over 300 pounds. I can’t imagine being 14 at 500+. I think it was right for them to take the child away. The mother works several jobs, and was given a warning and some time to start getting his weight under control. She has claimed she couldn’t afford anything. That in itself makes me sad.
Why, in America, can we not be proactive without a product? Does it just not occur to our consumer-driven minds? He should be out walking. Even if it’s just a couple of blocks to start.
I don’t think she should be charged with neglect. I think that going to jail for neglecting a child is really stupid and silly in many cases—but the judicial system is a whole new topic for someone else to blog about.
What I DO think is that they should both be entered in counseling, free access to a local pool for exercise that's gentle on the joints, and a couple of trips to the dietitician. The mother needs to learn how to say no, what proper eating looks like, and how to motivate her kid.
And the kid is getting to an age where he needs to take some responsibility for his actions. Which is rough, but he’ll feel better in the long run. If you want to read the article, head over to: http://www.dailyspark.com/blog.asp?post=should_mom_of_555lb_boy_be_charged_with_neglect
Friday, February 12, 2010
Adventures in Nutrition: Healthy Poppers
Sometimes, I like spicy foods. That little kick you get from something that’s spicy is just so satisfying! This week, I’m going to share two finds that are improved lifestyle friendly (ish).
As I peruse the hungry-girl website, I can’t help but be excited when I stumble upon a recipe for high fiber, low fat jalapeno poppers! I LOVE JALAPENO POPPERS! Gooey cheese, crispy coating, that zesty bite… Mmmm…. So when I saw a healthier recipe for these, I was all over it.
A brief jaunt to the store found me in my kitchen with my imaginary chef hat on. Neufchatel cheese? Check! Shredded, reduced fat cheddar? Check! Egg substitute and Fiber One? Check! Jalapenos? Check!
So, aside from being reminded that jalapeno really burns on open wounds, things went fairly well. You mix up the cheeses and put them in halves of jalapeno. From here, you dip them in egg substitute and then dip them in ground up Fiber One.
Everything went really well, til I ran out of Fiber One. I didn’t mind; I decided that I would just throw the two jalapenos with no coating in plain.
Waiting for these bad boys to cool down was agony. I just wanted one. As I bit down, I waited for the spicy kick and sinful indulgence of creamy cheesy goodness to hit my tongue. Instead, all I got was the sawdust taste of Fiber One, which overpowered the flavors of EVERYTHING else. Bleck! Maybe that one had too much coating. I tried a bite of one with less coating. Same result.
Please take note, people. Fiber One original is NOT actual food. It may appear to be so, but really, it is a mix of sawdust and cardboard.
The GOOD news is that sans Fiber One, the jalapenos with Neufchatel cheese and cheddar stuffing were REALLY good. Not quite a jalapeno popper, but still delicious. I’d make these again. If you wanna give it a try, head over to : http://www.hungry-girl.com/chew/chewdetails.php?isid=1014
The recipe calls for a lot of fat free stuff. Personally, I dislike fat free dairy immensely. 1% milk is as low as I’ll go. I grew up on whole milk, then two percent as an adolescent. Fat = creamy deliciousness.
As for the other thing… it requires absolutely no preparation other than opening the jar and counting out a serving size of chips. It’s “Pineapple Mango Chipotle Salsa” by Pace, and it’s really, really good. It’s sweet, but I found it to be just too spicy… Makes my mouth burn for a while after I eat it. The salsa itself is really low in calories and has no fat. I could eat it all day. Nom nom nom. If only I could convince myself it is dessert, maybe I could stay away from ice cream.
As I peruse the hungry-girl website, I can’t help but be excited when I stumble upon a recipe for high fiber, low fat jalapeno poppers! I LOVE JALAPENO POPPERS! Gooey cheese, crispy coating, that zesty bite… Mmmm…. So when I saw a healthier recipe for these, I was all over it.
A brief jaunt to the store found me in my kitchen with my imaginary chef hat on. Neufchatel cheese? Check! Shredded, reduced fat cheddar? Check! Egg substitute and Fiber One? Check! Jalapenos? Check!
So, aside from being reminded that jalapeno really burns on open wounds, things went fairly well. You mix up the cheeses and put them in halves of jalapeno. From here, you dip them in egg substitute and then dip them in ground up Fiber One.
Everything went really well, til I ran out of Fiber One. I didn’t mind; I decided that I would just throw the two jalapenos with no coating in plain.
Waiting for these bad boys to cool down was agony. I just wanted one. As I bit down, I waited for the spicy kick and sinful indulgence of creamy cheesy goodness to hit my tongue. Instead, all I got was the sawdust taste of Fiber One, which overpowered the flavors of EVERYTHING else. Bleck! Maybe that one had too much coating. I tried a bite of one with less coating. Same result.
Please take note, people. Fiber One original is NOT actual food. It may appear to be so, but really, it is a mix of sawdust and cardboard.
The GOOD news is that sans Fiber One, the jalapenos with Neufchatel cheese and cheddar stuffing were REALLY good. Not quite a jalapeno popper, but still delicious. I’d make these again. If you wanna give it a try, head over to : http://www.hungry-girl.com/chew/chewdetails.php?isid=1014
The recipe calls for a lot of fat free stuff. Personally, I dislike fat free dairy immensely. 1% milk is as low as I’ll go. I grew up on whole milk, then two percent as an adolescent. Fat = creamy deliciousness.
As for the other thing… it requires absolutely no preparation other than opening the jar and counting out a serving size of chips. It’s “Pineapple Mango Chipotle Salsa” by Pace, and it’s really, really good. It’s sweet, but I found it to be just too spicy… Makes my mouth burn for a while after I eat it. The salsa itself is really low in calories and has no fat. I could eat it all day. Nom nom nom. If only I could convince myself it is dessert, maybe I could stay away from ice cream.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Lowering my credit limit
Indecision is the thief of opportunity.
This isn’t so much because by not making a decision and working towards it all choices are taken, but by not making a choice, you lose opportunities.
Procrastination is a form of indecision. You are putting off the decision until later.
Dangerous territory.
I will eat better tomorrow. This week is blown; may as well start fresh next week. Only three more months to the new year… I’ll really change then, I will!
But… we don’t. I mean, who really sticks to their New Year’s resolution? Very few people.
And I’m guilty of this a lot. “I’ll start over tomorrow. Today doesn’t matter.”
And then I end up gorging on steak and pizza. Not that there is ANYTHING wrong with either of those, but a 10 ounce steak and two slices of pizza in the same day is a bit much, in conjunction with all the other stuff I ate.
I have a list of goals for 2010. My answer to a New Year’s resolution. I made them and haven’t thought about more than two of them.
1. Study abroad in the Czech Republic
2. Receive my baccalaureate degree in psychology, minor in English
3. Lose 32 pounds (And I'm totally okay with meeting that by, oh, midsummer and reevaluating! It's 10% of my body weight)
4. Be able to complete 2 sets of 12 boy pushups
5. Get my driver's license
6. Watch a Broadway musical
I’ve been thinking about the Czech Republic a lot. How am I going to afford it? The answer is that I have to stay focused and save what I can when I can. I was thinking about this as I transferred money from my savings to my checking account.
“I’ll replace it later.”
I do that to myself ALL the time. “I’ll eat better tomorrow.” “I’ll exercise later tonight.” “I’ll repay myself next paycheck.”
So I sat down and budgeted enough money for me to get two drinks at Starbucks, go out to eat twice (once per week), devote some money to my hobbies, pay my bills, and put the rest in my savings account.
It occurred to me how often I borrow against myself. I justify expenses. This weekend, I spent $35 dollars that I didn’t budget for. So instead of puling more money out of my savings, I’m just not going to go to the bar for the next two weeks. Does it suck? Yeah. Will I appreciate buying beer more in Czech Republic? Hell yeah.
So I need to start focusing on my health in the same way. I hadn’t realized how far I extend my credit with myself until I started looking at my finances and the way I hemorrhage money over stupid stuff. I’m going to cling to the money in my savings and I’m going to work towards my goals.
P.S. If anyone would like to teach me how to park, it’d be invaluable towards that whole “Get my driver’s license thing.” Just throwin’ it out there.
This isn’t so much because by not making a decision and working towards it all choices are taken, but by not making a choice, you lose opportunities.
Procrastination is a form of indecision. You are putting off the decision until later.
Dangerous territory.
I will eat better tomorrow. This week is blown; may as well start fresh next week. Only three more months to the new year… I’ll really change then, I will!
But… we don’t. I mean, who really sticks to their New Year’s resolution? Very few people.
And I’m guilty of this a lot. “I’ll start over tomorrow. Today doesn’t matter.”
And then I end up gorging on steak and pizza. Not that there is ANYTHING wrong with either of those, but a 10 ounce steak and two slices of pizza in the same day is a bit much, in conjunction with all the other stuff I ate.
I have a list of goals for 2010. My answer to a New Year’s resolution. I made them and haven’t thought about more than two of them.
1. Study abroad in the Czech Republic
2. Receive my baccalaureate degree in psychology, minor in English
3. Lose 32 pounds (And I'm totally okay with meeting that by, oh, midsummer and reevaluating! It's 10% of my body weight)
4. Be able to complete 2 sets of 12 boy pushups
5. Get my driver's license
6. Watch a Broadway musical
I’ve been thinking about the Czech Republic a lot. How am I going to afford it? The answer is that I have to stay focused and save what I can when I can. I was thinking about this as I transferred money from my savings to my checking account.
“I’ll replace it later.”
I do that to myself ALL the time. “I’ll eat better tomorrow.” “I’ll exercise later tonight.” “I’ll repay myself next paycheck.”
So I sat down and budgeted enough money for me to get two drinks at Starbucks, go out to eat twice (once per week), devote some money to my hobbies, pay my bills, and put the rest in my savings account.
It occurred to me how often I borrow against myself. I justify expenses. This weekend, I spent $35 dollars that I didn’t budget for. So instead of puling more money out of my savings, I’m just not going to go to the bar for the next two weeks. Does it suck? Yeah. Will I appreciate buying beer more in Czech Republic? Hell yeah.
So I need to start focusing on my health in the same way. I hadn’t realized how far I extend my credit with myself until I started looking at my finances and the way I hemorrhage money over stupid stuff. I’m going to cling to the money in my savings and I’m going to work towards my goals.
P.S. If anyone would like to teach me how to park, it’d be invaluable towards that whole “Get my driver’s license thing.” Just throwin’ it out there.
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